Monkeyboy's Revenge (Part 1)

In response to recent reports and accusations that his game is slipping, Poop Daddy (formerly known as Monkeboy) has agreed to an exclusive one-on-one interview with Halo Beat. Below is the first part of a 4 part series featuring the dialog from this historic conversation:

HB: Let's first start with the name change. Why the change from Monkeyboy to Poop Daddy?

PD: I know it may seem like a crazy thing to do at the height of my celebrity, but I needed a name to really convey what I'm all about. And it's not about being a Monkey...sure, that's part of it, but the reality of the situation is that when I'm on Ascension, hitting Spuds in the back of the noggin with a steamer, I have become his Daddy by covering him in my Poop. Poop Daddy just makes more sense. It's who I am. I am your Daddy and it's because of my Poop. I AM POOP DADDY!

HB: Makes perfect sense to me. Bye the way, nice chain.

* HB points to a large diamond encrusted gold medallion featuring the letters PD above three piles of poop with FB, Spuds and GT written on them.

PD: Thanks, I bought this with the money I earned from doing the cover for the last issue of Halo Beat.

HB: Well, it's some lovely bling. Your partner, Loss Cat has been quoted as saying "Now he couldn't hit air if he fell out of a plane" when talking about the alleged decline in your legendary sticky bomb tossing prowess. How would you like to respond to that?

PD: First, I'd like to make it very clear to my fans that the statement "he couldn't hit air if he fell out of a plane" is a complete falsitude. In fact, I have scientific proof of this and will be suing Loss Cat for slander, libel and basically just pissing me off if he doesn't issue a public apology.

* PD hands HB a signed and notorized letter from the Scientific Institute of Midgetology that says "If Poop Daddy were to fall out of a conventional aircraft(including a banshee) on the planet earth or any other planet that would involve Halo combat then he would indeed hit air 100% of the time. It's science." Also note that the letter is signed by Dr. Kenneth Noisewater a reputed expert in this field.

HB: PD, isn't Dr. Kenneth Noisewater the name of one of the testicles attached to Brian Fantana of Anchorman: Legend of Ron Burgandy fame?

PD: Um, I have no idea what you're talking about. Who is Ron Burgundy?

* Let the record show that behind PD is a large framed picture featuring PD and Will Ferrell(who seems to be wearing a Poop Daddy diamond-encrusted pendant) at a table full of midgets wearing lawn gnome outfits.

* At this point PD requests a short break to tend to the feeding of his Orangutan he affectionately calls "The Octagon"

Part 2 in this epic 4 part interview will be featured in next weeks' issue of Halo Beat

Dissension Amongst Power Duo?

Sanctuary (Astoria AP)-- In a breaking news story, sources have uncovered rumors that Loss Cat may be disgruntled with his partner, Monkeyboy. While the powerful duo have laid waste to all comers for years, Loss Cat seems unhappy with his partner's recent performance.

"He's slipping. I remember the days he could stick a field mouse at one hundred yards with a blindfold on," he told a small throng of reporters. "Now he couldn't hit air if he fell out of a plane. I think the celebrity has gone to his head. I even heard rumors that he's partying with Corey Haim and Emmanuel Lewis."

Monkeyboy has been known in the past for outrageous all-night Sambuca and San Loco binges, but apparently it has gotten worse.

"Have you seen the picture?" an emabarrassed Loss Cat asked reporters. "He's lost it."

The picture Loss Cat was referring to was recently discovered on a teen web site, Halo Beat. This black and white was reportedly snapped in the back room of the East Village hot spot, Company:















Monkeyboy could not be reached for comment.

Kodachrome, gives us the nice bright colors...

I was cleaning up around the apartment and I found some great pictures of our fellow Halo-ers.

Here we see Foyeboy at a younger age, still struggling with the concept of Halo confidence:

An adorable shot of young Glowtone, circa 1982:

Monkeyboy, too young to give his opponents the middle finger but smart enough to have his Mom do it for him:

This is a good one. We see Loss Cat pointing a battle rifle at Foyeboy, hiding in the arms of Spuds:

I'm not sure when this was taken, but I'm pretty sure it was after I gave Spuds a beat down:

Lastly, a fantatsic shot of Skempa flanked by his old Hoboken roommates, Damell and Aaron: